Wednesday, January 19, 2005

The path to developing Jesus!

The GRE, all you have to lose is $115 and a piece of your self-esteem.

When I was in HS there was a poster on the math office door that read, "Not taking math? Say good-bye to these careers" and it listed like over 100 careers. Freshman year, being in algebra I, and kicking serious ass and being the emerging hardcore feminist I looked at the poster and with confidence promised myself that I was going to continue with math. Then sophmore year came Geometry, a C+ on my transcript and the end of that year the option to withdraw from math class. Knowing that Trig was worse than Geometry and having my sights set on going to a college where my mom could brag to her friends, I did what any person would have done in my shoes...dropped math and doubled up on the courses where I would kick ass like English and History.

Little did I know that I would be shooting myself in the foot 7 years later with a barely satisfied math requirement on my transcript and this lovely test called the GRE. Trying to get into a social stats program at an Ivy League school. EVEN WITH A COURSE, having spent about an hour and a half on a new lesson AND I AM NOT DONE TEACHING MYSELF WHAT I NEVER LEARNED...I have come to the realization that I am FUCKED without lube like a porn star up the ass.

Stanely Kaplan, I dont need your strategies, let's start with the basics such as how the fuck I add fractions! Let me master how to add 1/2 + 1/4 + 3/9 then I'll begin to study your backwards guessing, and educated picking #'s because right now they are slightly useless, especially since I dont know what they are asking. But oh class wont be covering it because the entire class is ASIAN and English is definately nobody's first language. And of course I am the dumb white girl who sits in the corner...but dont worry, next week when we get to Verbal they'll know exactly how I feel during our math classes.

Do you know what kind of effect this has on my self-esteem?! A Middle schooler or a gifted ELEMENTARY SCHOOL CHILD has more math capabilities than I do...did I mention that I am in market research...where we use stats?! I think it is safe to deduce that, like most things I get in my life, I got on my bullshit skills as opposed to actual merit and skill.


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